Monday’s post didn’t go up because there was a family emergency and I rushed home. I was gonna post the day after but I decided to give myself some time to relax. I have been so exhausted lately.
There needs to be a way for me to let you guys know when I won’t be able to post. I’ll leave my twitter (@MyBoringLife_) and I’ll keep that posted in the future.
That being said, I feel like i’m growing into this whole new person. I feel like blogging has helped that. Especially because this is my own form of expression. Expressing myself is amazing to me because while growing up, I kept so much bottled in. I refused to express my thoughts and opinions because I was scared to see how they would react.
I’ve grown to just not freaking care. It’s one thing to express yourself and another thing to express yourself while still caring how others feel. Am I making sense? I’m kinda tired. Like, say I wanna die my hair blue because blue is my happy color. I’ve decided to do it, bought the products, finished the whole process of dyeing and my hair is styled how I want. Personally, I love it and I KNOW this is what I want. Then I go out and my best friend says that she doesn’t really like how my hair is. So does my dad, my sisters and my neighbor. Now, I could be insecure because look at all these people who say my hair is horrible. It’s that choice to just say, “fuck it” who cares what you feel about the hair that I love.
There is power in standing in your truth and maintaining a “fuck it” mentality. I know that i care about so many people and I know that I have so many responsibilities. I just know that I need to stay true to myself and my needs and what I want. I won’t say that I take my own advice all the time but I definitely feel it today. I just do what feels right for me.
I have become a new person who is still growing but I am so happy about the person I am now. I love my hair, my skin, my clothes, my friends, my family. I feel like I’m in a good place for growth and understanding.
I just wish I learned how to sleep and to actually manage my asthma and cramps, I’ll just put that in the growth column.
Goodnight, all. I cannot wait to finally go to sleep. If i’m on my game, Monday’s post will be up at my typical time, noonish.